“There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.” -Albert Einstein (himself a preemie)

Everything is a miracle.  We have witnessed 15 weeks of it and this one has had us holding our breath during new challenges and exhaling – speechless and proud.

15 weeks (39 weeks gestational) Update

weight: 3,465 (7 lb 10 oz)| height: 20.5 inches

As we head into the last week of our ‘pregnancy’ we can’t help but revisit those first pictures, those first moments.  We are living proof that miracles exist.  We have watched our son grow from a 1 pound 11 oz half baked baby with eyes fused shut and skin so translucent you could see through to the core.  We have watched him grow into a full term sized baby with battle scars and tales to tell for a lifetime.  

This upcoming weekend is our original due date and as it approaches it’s hitting Mommy harder than expected.  We can’t say why — we knew this day was coming — but there is a pang of guilt that lingers in her heart and tears still left to be shed for this original blissful moment we got robbed of.  Today is not for crying though, today is for telling all of Jack’s fans what incredible mountains he successfully climbed this week.  Here goes–

Eyes: We last left off that the Retina Specialist was coming back due to still seeing some Plus Disease after the first laser treatment from Jack’s Retina of Prematurity (ROP).  He came back, and it had regressed week over week!  Jack did not have to get the second laser treatment and he might have to down the line but he lives another day laser free!

Respiratory: The biggie! WE ARE CYCLING PEOPLE!! What that means is Jack cycles off CPAP for 3 hours and is breathing a steady flow of oxygen (nasal cannula) on his own and then goes back onto CPAP for 9 hours for a break.  And repeat.  The first moment Jack was off CPAP was a moment Mommy and Daddy held their breath and when Jack exhaled successfully so did we.  We have a lot of steps to go on the respiratory front but it’s reassuring to see that his lungs are up for a challenge!

Bottle Feeding: To really put Jack to task we have introduced him to his first bottle feed.  We only put 10 cc’s of breast milk into the bottle to start as to not overwhelm and the purpose was to see how he would react since this is the first time he’s fed without a tube.  Sure enough, he’s our child, he SCARFED it down.  We only bottle feed during the cycle when he’s off the CPAP because it’s too much pressure being blown up his nose if we were to try and learn to suck, swallow and breathe all during that.  So his bottle attempts are during nasal cannula time and back to gavage (tube) feeding during CPAP.  Feedings are a learning process for Mommy and Daddy too.  For a full term baby, it’s a natural process and they get the hang pretty quickly of how to pull it all together.  For a micro preemie, we have to ‘sideline’ feed- we position Jack almost on his side and this allows him to take sucks off the bottle and the milk pools and dribbles on the inside of his cheek instead of shooting back in his throat and causing a startle, forgetting to breathe and the dreaded B-word (bradycardia).  We are now a few days into a couple bottle feeds per day and he did great but as always, we are cautiously optimistic.

Breast Feeding: On Tuesday, February 9th 2016 at 11am — 105 days after the birth of our son, Mommy put Jack to the breast.  For all Mommy’s exclusively pumping out there for their NICU babies- we are superheroes. Exhausted, chapped, desperate super heroes.  There are many moments you feel alone and utterly exhausted, you inhale your babies blanket he was wrapped in that day at the hospital and inhale so deep to try and make it like you’re in the room together.  It’s agony.  You feel jealous of others at home nestled with the warmth of their body entangled with their baby’s.  It all washed away today. Today was a day we will never take for granted because we know the hard work it took to get here.  Jack – thank you for today, once again you must have known Mommy needed this boost with the upcoming due date throwing her for a loop.  You never stop trucking along kid, and neither will we.

100 Days Celebration:  It was a day fit for a king…wearing a crown…in a tuxedo onesie…propped up on his boppy throne.  This journey has taught us many life lessons and we’ll forever live by the most important one of all — Cherish and celebrate every moment.  Even if that moment is the 100th day you’ve spent in a NICU, life is too precious not to celebrate it all!

Baby Shower: Attempt #2 to have a baby shower is happening (last go around we went into labor the week before).  For awhile we didn’t feel ready and weren’t concerned with a shower.  We clearly weren’t up to the life lesson chapter on celebrating every moment but we are now and excited to celebrate the early arrival of baby Jack with Mommy’s favorite ladies.

Project Nursery: Mommy has successfully cleared her second closet out into a space that will one day house King Jack.  The crib and dresser have been delivered — after a long day at the hospital it was like Christmas morning running up the stairs to see them both set up.  We felt like ‘normal’ parents gearing up for the arrival of their first baby.  If only for a moment, it made us think about all the memories we’ll make inside this room and all the good times ahead of us.  

Happy 15th Week baby Jack!  You’re here for a much bigger reason than any of us fully understand yet but your impact has been felt and it’s limitless.  This week was another miracle week in the books.  You are the reason we hop out of bed with hope each morning.  Something tells us that’s how life will be with you forever.  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

First bottle feed!